Addicted
by Silver Miko
Summary: Takes place in the episode 'Kagome's Voice and Kikyo's Kiss', how does Kagome react and deal with Inu Yasha's confession that he never stopped thinking of Kikyo when she tries to take him to hell with her?


Hey people.....oh my it's been so long since I last posted!!! Oh dear....well, I was driving home one night from work when I heard a song on the radio, 'Addicted' by Simple Plan.... and I jsut had a great idea after watching Inu Yasha...^_^ And a couple Cokes in the process..   
I was watching the episode, 'Kikyo's Kiss and Kagome's Voice'. or something like that. So it takes place then.  
Enjoy!  
***  
  
  
ADDICTED  
by Silver Miko  
MidnightSiren182@yahoo.com  
***  
Pinned to a tree by the demons serving Kikyo, the priestess who once guarded the Shikon no Tama and who she was the reincarnation of, Kagome watched painfully and unheard as the dead priestess embraced Inu Yasha. She knew deep down, this would happen eventually. She couldn't expect Inu Yasha to get over Kikyo so easily, could she? He had loved her and lost her through means of deception, and even with all the bitterness of the past, he still......  
  
"I never stopped thinking about you! I think about you every minute!!!" Inu Yasha yelled to Kikyo and Kagome gasped. IT was true. Even if she was always by his side...even if she had come back from her world, he still loved Kikyo. He still wanted to be with Kikyo, not her. After all they'd been through, she thought he cared more.   
'You've been fooling yourself, Kagome. He'll never feel that way about you as he does for Kikyo...she's the one he'll always want.'   
'No!'  
"Inu Yasha! Inu Yasha! INU YASHA!!!" she yelled.  
  
  
**  
Kagome walked away, sensing Inu Yasha following her. Inu Yasha had broken free from Kikyo's grasp, and Kikyo disappeared, the spirits that she had been using to function leaving her. The emotional damage was still done.   
"Wait Kagome!"  
"Inu Yasha, I think we should go our seperate ways and search for the jewel shards seperately." she said, fists clenched. Did he even know? Understand how much pain he had unwittingly caused her with his words to Kikyo?  
" But you're the only one who can sense jewel shards and that's why we need you!" Inu Yasha explained, his voice a little angry.   
'What right do you have to be angry with me Inu Yasha! Are you that dense?!! Can't you see this hurts me even to suggest! You make me so mad!' she thought.  
"Is that the only reason?! I see..forget this! I'm going home!!" she declared angrily, stomping off.   
"Wait Kagome! You can't just.."  
"SIT!!!"  
"AHH!!!!!!"  
  
Kagome stalked off alone and finally after fifteen minutes sat down on the ground and leaned against a large tree. Fishing through her backpack, pulling out her CD Walkman and putting it on. She just wanted to shut out the world and have a sense of home. After everything she kept coming back here to the fuedal era and to Inu Yasha for what? To have her heart constantly filled with hope then torn apart. At least he didn't see here as the reincarnation of Kikyo anymore. She remembered when they first met he thought she was Kikyo, but over time he saw her for herself, Higurashi Kagome. Not the reincarnation of the dead priestess Kikyo, who he had loved. Did she wish he saw her as Kikyo's reincarnation? She sighed in disgust at the thought as she pressed play and music began.  
  
I heard you're doing okay  
but I want you to know  
I'm a dick  
I'm addicted to you  
I can't pretend I don't care   
when you don't think of me  
do you think I deserve this?  
  
  
It was a band from Canada called Simple Plan that Kagome had become a fan of. Listening to the words she thought more of Inu Yasha. Why the hell did she have to care so much about him anyway?! He was a jerk! Totally frustrating and impossibly stubborn!! So why did he get to her? Because she did care. She cared a lot. It was the last thing she expected but somehow over time she developed strong feelings for him. She had risked her life for him and sacrificed a lot for him. she told herself she came back to help everyone, but it was her worry for Inu Yasha that was the real reason. And he didn't even seem to care. He sent her home, tried to keep her there for her safety, but was it just an excuse to get rid of her? She thought he had cared about, but it was just because he needed her to find the jewels. Was that it? Was she just a means to an end?  
  
I tried to make you happy  
but you left me anyway  
  
And I'm trying to forget that  
I'm addicted to you  
buy I want it and I need it  
I'm addicted to you  
Now it's over  
Can't forget what you said  
and I never  
want to do this again  
heartbreaker heartbreaker  
  
She wished she could pretend he never said those words, that he didn't always think of Kikyo, but it was a lie. How she envied the willowly priestess. She was a demon in a sense, because no matter what she possessed Inu Yasha almost completely. That was Kikyo's goal. To possess Inu Yasha's heart to live on forever. Kikyo really was a demon. Even so, she had what Kagome secretly did want more than anything else, Inu Yasha's heart.  
  
Since the day I met you  
and after all we've been through  
I'm still a dick  
Still addicted to you  
I think you know that it's true  
I'd run a thousand miles to get you  
Do you think I deserve this?  
  
  
He never noticed it. How much she cared, how much she would risk for him? She'd been fooling herself into thinking Inu Yasha would care for her as he did for Kikyo. The sad thing was, she still felt the same. She'd cross time for him and put her life on the line for him. What did it matter, it was all said and done. She knew his feelings. He'd made them clear to Kikyo.   
  
I tried to make you happy  
I did all that I could  
just to keep you  
but you left me anyway  
  
I'm trying to forget that  
I'm addicted to you  
but I want it and I need it  
I'm addicted to you  
Now it's over  
can't forget what you said  
and I never  
want to do this again  
heartbreaker heartbreaker  
  
  
She hated this. Hated feeling this sense of loss. Knowing she couldn't compete with someone who really was herself in a past life. It was almost like hating herself. There was a difference between her and Kikyo, though, one she was glad for. Kikyo allowed herself to be manipulated, and allowed herself to be corrupted. Kagome knew deep down she had enough faith to never let than happen. If Kikyo had lived, had been born in her time, would she have been exactly like Kagome?  
How long will I be waiting  
Until the end of time  
Don't know why I'm still waiting  
I can't make you mine  
heartbreaker heartbreaker  
  
Inu Yasha. Just thinking of his name brought tears to her eyes as she finally gave in and let herself cry. Cry for her situation, her hurt, her heart, her love, her pride. Everything she held in came out, poured out in a storm of emotion. She knew, even though she was angry, she probably wouldn't end up leaving. She still had things to do, people to help here. THere were reasons to be here besides Inu Yasha. He was just her main reason. She needed to forget about her feelings for him for the time being. Remain objective. IT was all she could do until the storm passed. It was going to be tense between her and Inu Yasha, but somehow things would settle into place...maybe.   
  
I'm trying to forget that  
I'm addicted to you  
but I want it and I need it  
I'm addicted to you  
I'm trying to forget that  
I'm addicted to you  
but I want it and I need it  
I'm addicted to you  
Now it's over  
can't forget what you said  
and I never  
want to do this again  
heartbreaker heartbreaker  
I'm addicted to you  
heartbreaker  
I'm addicted to you  
heart breaker  
She still wondered though, even as the last tears passed, would he ever put Kikyo to rest in his mind? Standing up and brushing the grass off her school uniform, she walked back to where Inu Yasha, Miroku, and Shippo were.   
'Sometimes' she thought, 'it sucks to want to be around someone so much! Especially when they make it so hard!'  
  
THe End  
I know how Kagome feels. I'm currently stuck liking a guy who likes me too, but it's like in between friendship and dating and this song is kinda funny cuz I was talking to him on the way home (on our cell phones) and I put in Simple Plan and let him listen, and he was screaming the lyrics cuz he knew the song. It was funny so I always think of it when I see him lately. Geez I hope things work out.  
Any way...got to go to Art History....yah.... 


End file.
